Some of you may have noticed I have been very quiet on this blog over the past week. Today I wanted to do something a little different and open up about something I have been struggling with and something I’m sure many of my fellow students or working readers have experienced.
Imposter syndrome is defined as:
“the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one’s own efforts or skills.”
To give a bit of context, this past week I started my first internship. I thought I would use this September and gain some experience in a company I thought I would enjoy working for and with tasks that would fit my capabilities. When I submitted my CV and application although hopeful I didn’t expect to hear back. When I did and was told my CV fitted with the role perfectly and they were confident enough in me to skip the interview process I was shocked, to say the least. This immediately put pressure on.
Looking at my previous experience and portfolio you could say I looked perfect for the role however now I am in it I feel like an imposter and way out of my depth. A large part of the role also involves blogging which has definitely contributed as to why I have been so inactive over the past week here on my blog. Trying to juggle working on a blog other than my own all day leaves little motivation to come home and hop on here.
The blogging I am doing at the internship is VERY different from what I do here on my blog. Trying to write for a very different target audience and one I don’t fit into myself is challenging. As the internship goes on I hope to start to understand the company and their audience better however at the moment I do feel a little out of my depth. I do feel like I led the company on to believe I was more qualified for the role than I actually am, though I’m not sure how as everything on my CV is accurate. This is a classic example of imposter syndrome!
Looking further into this though has shown I am definitely not the first to feel this way and I won’t be the last. In fact, it is common to feel like this in a new role especially when out of your comfort zone and doing something new.
Looking at it now I have come to realise this is not the first time I have felt like this. There have been times during class at University, in my job, even online at times I have felt similar. This is partly why I don’t like to call myself a ‘blogger’ as I don’t think I am consistent enough or have a big enough following to class myself as one.
I think the most important thing I have learnt is to not let this hold you back and stop you trying to achieve the goals you originally set out to reach. This does mean stepping out of that comfort zone though and pushing yourself though which I know can be scary! Believing in yourself is also pretty important when it comes to tackling this.
Just keep pushing yourself and growing! You will learn SO much about yourself as a person and although it may be causing pain in the meantime in the future you will be grateful for pushing your way through.
Have you experienced imposter syndrome? If you have let me know below and give any tips you may have. Let’s start a discussion in the comments!